


Bad Night

by Hekate1308



Series: Balance and New Beginnings [15]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, M/M, season 12 au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-25
Updated: 2017-04-25
Packaged: 2018-10-23 20:20:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,507
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10726500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hekate1308/pseuds/Hekate1308
Summary: Dean has a bad feeling about this.Maybe feeling is the wrong word for it, though.Try as he might, sometimes he slips back into his old mindset.He’s happy, living his life, and suddenly he’s sure that he and Cas won’t last and Sammy will run away again and Crowley will try to kill them and Mick will end up being a spy and the British Men of Letters will eradicate all their friends and come for them and Dean will be unable to protect his family and and and...





	Bad Night

So far, the British Men of letters have accomplished nothing they set out to do. Monsters are still around, they’ve lost several of their members (and one of them joined the enemy, on top of that) and American hunters flee in the other direction if they catch a glimpse of them miles away.

Still, Dean has a bad feeling about this.

Maybe feeling is the wrong word for it, though.

Try as he might, sometimes he slips back into his old mindset.

He’s happy, living his life, and suddenly he’s sure that he and Cas won’t last and Sammy will run away again and Crowley will try to kill them and Mick will end up being a spy and the British Men of Letters will eradicate all their friends and come for them and Dean will be unable to protect his family and and and...

“Dean?”

Of course Cas woke up.

He was hoping to sit in the dark for a while longer. He can hear his own thoughts better in silence.

Give it to Crowley though, in the old times he never sat around and moped in front of a swimming pool.

Cas sits down next to him.

“What’s wrong, love?”

He sighs. Here he is, trying to drown in self-pity, and of course there’s his boyfriend trying to make him feel better, to make him feel loved.

And damn him if he’s not succesfull.

Dean knows he’ll just keep going until he sees the light again.

They used to have a lot of talks like this in the beginning, when everything hurt and he’d just walked away from the only real home apart from his car he’d ever known.

He lets his head sink on Cas’ shoulder.

“I’ve just been thinking...”

Cas gently runs his fingers through his hair.

“No, you weren’t. You were putting yourself down and imagining worst case scenarios”.

He chuckles.

“That has been my way of doing it for most of my life.”

“It’s not anymore”.

“I wouldn’t be so sure.”

“I _am_ sure, Dean. Me and Sam aren’t the only people who’ve changed in the last two years. You’ve allowed the bright light of your soul to shine through the facade.”

“How am I ever going to beat myself up over stuff properly with you saying things like that” Dean mumbles, turning his head to press a kiss against Cas’ neck.

“You’re not supposed to anyway.”

“I know, I know. It’s just... this whole thing... she’s our mother, Cas.”

He’s still stroking Dean’s hair.

“She is.”

“And she... took one look at us and decided we weren’t worth sticking around. I know that’s not what she said, but it’s how it felt. And then she took Sammy, and they wanted to kill everything that moved the wrong way, and I just... couldn’t stay.”

“Sam came back though” Cas reminds him. “Of his own free will.” After a pause he adds, “And there’s Crowley.”

Dean snorts.

“Good luck getting rid of him. Do you have any idea what he does at night?”

“No” Cas answers. “And I don’t think I want to know”.

Dean chuckles again, relaxing against his angel.

“Yes, he did. And we got lucky with the other hunters and the good monsters...”

“We didn’t get lucky. Your reputation...”

“Our reputation.”

“Still. You know my people skills aren’t exactly... excellent”.

Dean smiles.

“Do you think we can trust Mick?” he asks suddenly.

“We have until now... Do you have a reason – “

“No, no. Quite the contrary. Guy’s been nothing but accommodating and eager to learn. Just – some nights – “

Cas’ arm travels down his back to wrap itself firmly around Dean.

“I understand.”

Of course he does. Cas has bad nights too, when he wakes up from nightmares about angels falling and people dying at his hands, and Dean always does his best to help.

He doesn’t mind. It’s part of the deal, he gets to be with Cas in the process, so why should he?

Dean sighs.

“I just wish my brain could stop now and then.”

“It’s been doing a good job recently, I’d say.”

Cas is right, of course. Every night used to be a bad night. Every day used to be a nightmare. He dragged himself through his sorry existence using alcohol to numb the pain, convinced that this would only end with a bullet stuck between his eyes.

But times changed. He changed. He made only yesterday’s dinner while he was singing and dancing around in the kitchen.

He is happy.

Most of the time.

“What did I do to deserve you?” he mumbles, leaning a bit heavier against Cas.

Not his fault the guy’s freaking comfortable.

“You were yourself”.

“Can we stay here just for a while longer?”

“Of course, Dean.”

And with the moonlight dancing across the water and Cas’ arms around him, Dean feels the bad night leave, being replaced by the comfort and love he’s come to know so well.

He doesn’t realize his eyes have closed until Cas gently shakes him.

“We should go back to bed.”

And he allows his boyfriend to gently guide him to their room, exhaustion having lulled him into a relaxing half-sleep.

Once they’re in bed, Cas draws him into his arms once more.

“Sleep well, love.”

He does.

The next morning, he gets up somewhat later than usual. Cas is already awake, most likely in the kitchen nursing his third cup of coffee.

Dean smiles into his pillow before he finally leaves the bed.

The bad night has passed.

To his surprise, not even Crowley reacts to his lying in. And Mick even admits to having hit the snooze button two times today.

Two times. Imagine that. They’ll make a hunter out of him yet.

“How are you?” Cas asks softly as he hands him a plate full of bacon, his favourite breakfast.

He kisses him.

“I’m good, sunshine.”

Cas’ smile is dazzling.

Again, though, no comment from Crowley. Weird. Normally the guy is sarcasm personified.

Sam corners him later, however.

“Dean? Cas seemed worried about you at breakfast...” He bites his lip.

“You don’t ahve to talk about it if you don’t want it, of course, but...”

“Nah, Sammy, nothing to worry about. Just had a bad night.”

“Oh” Sam says softly. Of course he’s no stranger to those, either.

“But you’re feeling better now?”

“Yeah. Cas took care of it. He’s good at that.” He winks.

Sam rolls his eyes but doesn’t reply.

Meanwhile, Crowley joins Cas in the library.

“Where did you put the works about Hebrew spells? Garth needs help.”

“Third shelf to your right, feathers.”

As Cas is getting the book, he asks, “Is Dean alright?”

“Yes.”

“Just asking. Moping and staring at the swimming pool at night doesn’t exactly scream well balanced and content.”

So he saw Dean yesterday. Cas isn’t surprised.

“It’s no coincidence I woke up, is it.”

“Do you really think Squirrel would leave you any different than carefully tucked in?”

He woke up with the blanket on the floor.

“So he’s really alright”.

“Yes.”

Then, to prove how much he doesn’t care, Crowley announces, “Good then. I have better things to do with my time anyway” and turns around.

Cas just smiles.

 

She doesn’t think much of Mary Winchester. Too much like her sons. Too undisciplined, too eager to attack without a plan.

But she’s got solid principles, and she knows what she wants.

The colonies free of monsters just like the home country.

Dr. Hess won’t deny that she’s disappointed in Mick Davies. After all the work she put in him, she hoped for a better outcome. He looked promising, once upon a time.

And then he somehow made contact with the Winchesters.

She doesn’t understand how they could unravel his careful training so quickly. He should have been able to withstand their apparently not too underestimate personal charm.

But others knew Sam Winchester for over a year and nothing happened. It must be the two brothers together.

They still haven’t figured out how much Davies told them. She’s made her displeasure clear to Elton and Willoughby.

Because apparently she has to do everything on her own, she’s currently going through his room, but there’s little evidence –

There’s barely any evidence there, period.

“Elton?” she calls out.

He appears in the doorway.

“Where are Mr. Davies personal effects?”

“I – we – they should be here, ma’am.”

“They are not.”

He hurries away to investigate, but she has her own ideas.

The demon who helped was the King of Hell, according to Mary Winchester.

As if it’s not enough that they are working with monsters.

It’s high time they are dealt with once and for all.

Mary Winchester might become a problem eventually, when she realizes that they are too dangerous to be allowed to live.

They will see what to do about her then.

First of all, the Winchesters need to be found.

Dr. Hess purses her lips.

The hunters found a traitor to help them.

They should be able to do the same.


End file.
